Popping the Question this Christmas? Pre-nups and Proposals

Are you planning to propose to your beloved this Christmas? If so, you’ll be joining the 17% of couples getting engaged in December, the most popular month for marriage proposals. The most popular day is Christmas Day itself, with 4% of UK proposals made alongside turkeys, trees and tinsel, closely followed by:

New Year's Eve – 3.5%
Christmas Eve – 2.7%
Boxing Day – 2.6%

Why get a pre-nup?

Getting married and sharing your lives together is a big milestone, as it affects every part of your life, from finances to families, property to pensions. A pre-nup (pre-nuptial) agreement will help clarify what assets each brings to the marriage, and how assets would be divided if the marriage does not work out.

Yet according to research by Handelsbanken Wealth & Asset Management into pre-nups in the UK:

Only 11% of married couples have a pre-nup in place
For couples aged 55+, that figure falls to just 1%.

One bit of good news is that:

“Increasingly younger married couples are more likely to have a prenuptial agreement (40% of those aged 18 to 35 years) than older married couples.”

Thinking of creating a pre-nup?

We’re here to help. Contact us for a consultation before you ask the question, so you can be sure that ‘yes’ is the right answer for both of you.

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See our pre-nup page here

Why do so few couples have pre-nups?

One survey showed majority of couples were perfectly happy to discuss major issues and responsibilities before getting engaged. According to The Knot Jewelry & Engagement Study, of the US couples surveyed:

51% already owned a pet together
69% lived together
78% talked about politics
87% discussed having children
89% discussed managing their money

So, why did these discussions not result in a pre-nup? According to the Handelsbanken research, 32% of couples said they didn’t have a pre-nup because they simply didn’t see them separating. (This is despite the stat that 20% of marriages end within 10 years.)

Can pre-nups kill romance?

As experienced family lawyers, we know how couples don’t want to dampen the romance by discussing how their marriage might end before they have even started it! However, any pre marriage or cohabitation agreement is actually both a practical and a caring and considered move, recognising what each person brings, their individual worth, and help protect their contribution should the relationship break down.

As Christine Ross of Handelsbanken said:

“While conversations about prenups between couples can initially feel uncomfortable and may be perceived as displaying a lack of trust, they play a crucial role in safeguarding the interests and financial security of everyone involved. Those who do not have one in place face the risk of lost assets and diminished financial security.”

What should my pre-nup cover?

Pre-nups should cover the following as a minimum:

Your property / properties

Any prenuptial agreement needs to include provision for the properties each of you own. Most importantly, it should detail what will happen to the family home if you divorce. This is particularly important if you have, or plan to have, children.

Investments, saving - and debt

The average age of UK couples marrying for the first time has risen over the past decade, to

30.1 for men
28.2 for women

That means that as a couple you have probably already accumulated reasonable levels of savings and investments in your own names. These need to be accounted for in the pre-nup, along with any outstanding debt and who will pay for that. Your prenup can ring-fence your own existing assets, and protect against debt liability if either one of you build up debt.

Your pensions

Pre-nups must cover pensions for one simple reason: your pension doesn't automatically go to your spouse. Pensions are often assigned to a nominated person, who may or may not be your spouse or partner. The law does have provision for married couples to safeguard in the event of one partner dying, but not if you divorce or separate. For more on pensions and divorce, see our blog

Private school fees

In our experience, one of the major issues in divorce for high net worth individuals, and increasingly, those with SEND children, is who will pay the private school fees on separation. Including this in the pre-nup is part of a long-term commitment to privately educate your children,often from ages 5 to 18. It represents a major outlay for many years, and again, is something you should both agree on before marriage whether you already have children, or plan to.

Inheritance provision

The question of inheritance is often mistakenly left as provision in a will. However, if you’re getting married for the first time, your demise is hopefully a long way off. A pre-nup can be used to ring-fence assets, property and items that you or your future spouse intend to pass on to the family in your will. There is no point in leaving items or money in your will if they are lost during the divorce proceedings. Neither would you want to lose an inheritance you may have personally received as part of the division of assets in a divorce financial agreement, for example.

Children and blended families

Your pre-nup needs to include details of provision for all your children, current and future. It’s important for those creating a new blended family to protect any rights of your children from a previous marriage or relationships have if your new marriage breaks down. Again, couples sometimes think this only applies to making provision in their will, but when a relationship ends, they need to be protected at that time, not (potentially) decades ahead.

Pre-nup FAQs

Q. Are pre-nups expensive?

Like all legal documents, there are professional fees associated with drawing up a pre-nup that is comprehensive, balanced and agreeable to both parties. However, compared to the costs of a marriage, (let alone a divorce), they represent incredible value for money! According to Bridebook, the average UK costs for a wedding in 2025 were £20,822, excluding engagement ring and honeymoon costs.

If just your discussions about a pre-nup reveal major differences between you, then at least you have time to talk them through before paying thousands on an engagement ring. According to Queensmith jewellers:

“While the UK average is around £2,000, those in London and the South East typically spend between £3,500 and £6,500.”

Q. Are pre-nups legally binding?

As we explain on our prenups, post-nups and cohabitation agreement page:

“Prenuptial agreements are not yet legally binding in the UK. However they can be taken into consideration by judges in financial proceeding within a divorce.”

In our experience, judges do look at pre-nups favourably, as it details each spouse’s position at the beginning of the marriage, and not just what their current position is.

Q. Do pre-nups apply to civil partnerships?

Yes, as civil partners have the same rights to married couples should their partnership be dissolved.

Q. Is there a pre-nup for couples who are planning to live together?

For non-married couples planning to live together, or already living together, a cohabitation agreement is essential. It lays down important details for who brings what to the relationship in terms of assets, sets out who pays for what in the relationship, and how assets would be divided on separation.

Unlike married couples, there is no automatic legal protection for unmarried partners in terms of divisions of assets, the family home, pensions and more on separation. A cohabitation agreement is also active all the time, not just when you separate. For more on cohabitation agreements, see our page here and more about pre-nups and pensions here

Q. Do pre-nups apply to nikkah marriages?

Traditional nikkah marriages may involve sizeable gifts and investment by both families. However, the traditional nikkah format is not a legally binding marriage as it is usually conducted without a registrar being present to register the marriage. Increasingly we are helping clients who didn’t realise their marriage was not legal and they are treated as cohabitees by the law when they separate from their nikkah “spouse”.

So, if you are in a nikkah marriage, a cohabitation agreement is suitable, but you will have so much more protection if you simply get married in a registry office either before or immediately after your traditional celebrations, and have a pre-nup in place. For more on nikkah marriages and separation, see our video series.

Pre-nups and proposals

Whilst we can’t help with planning that magical proposal at Christmas, we can help with your prenuptial agreement. Just contact us to discuss your requirements.

About the author

Rita Gupta is Co-founder and Managing Director of family law firm LGFL Ltd, serving family law for clients in the Reading and Thames Valley area, across the UK and for international clients involved in UK divorce cases. She has featured as a family law expert on national TV and radio, including BBC Radio 5 Live with Nicky Campbell, LBC, GB News with Darren McCaffrey and local TV and radio.

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Listed in Chambers and Partners
Listed Leading Lawyer at Wiselaw
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